Pure Hatred

November 1, 2009 – 1:35 am

Hatred. We can hate places, foods — just about anything.

Example: I hate the color called lime green. I don’t care if it’s the fashion color this year. I can’t stand it and I won’t wear it.

Hostility, rage, fury, resentment, indignation, anger, a fit of temper, a quick temper, angry:

It seems that these words are used to define each other, but they all mean ill will. We don’t like something or someone. In practice, fine distinctions are often not made between the meanings of these words. They are just used in certain ways.

A parent may complain, for example, that her child was sulky and refused to eat dinner. Rebellious teenagers often appear sullen but don’t say anything antagonistic; that is, they don’t say anything to start an argument. Resentment is considered to be a particularly unhealthy emotion, because it is held in the body for a long period of time. A person can harbor a resentment secretly. Rage and fury are more explosive and outwardly visible. One speaks, for example, of the fury of a raging storm.

Anger is usually felt in the body as an increase in tension. Sometimes the face of an angry man turns red and sometimes it turns white.

Sometimes you will not see that the other person is angry, because he is hiding it. He is suppressing his anger.

Sometimes people are angry but don’t feel angry, and this is called repressed anger.

Mental health professionals consider it good when an angry person knows that he is angry and experiences his anger in his body. When he does not know that he is angry, this is one way of  “being out of touch with one’s feelings.”

Even though a person knows he is angry and is experiencing anger in his body, that does not mean he must speak in anger or act in anger.  We are all capable of self-control.

Often the angry person is seeing things from one side only, temporarily forgetting that there are at least two sides to everything. Often an angry person feels afraid or helpless, and it’s best to remember that.

Some Question for Discussion:

(1) When was the last time you felt angry?

(2) On that occasion, how long did you feel angry? Was it for one or more days? Was it for five or ten minutes? Or was it more like a flash of anger?

(3) When you felt angry, did you speak in anger?

(4) What happened then?

(5) Have you ever tried to count to 10 before speaking in anger?

(6) The angry person always feels he is right and the other person is wrong, isn’t it so?

(7) Do you think there is any point in arguing with a person when he is angry?

(7) What are some ways you calm down when you are angry?

The photograph is a detail from a painting by Rachell Sumpter entitled “Molten Kin.”

Copyright © 2009           Barbara A. English          All rights reserved.